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I don’t mean to gloat…well, okay, I do mean to gloat.  I’m only doing so because this will probably never happen again.  But I went 7 for 7 in picks for Judgment Day!  If you didn’t catch my article wherein I discuss my picks for Judgment Day, go read that now, because I’m going to talk about the matches right now.

Umaga defeated CM Punk to start the show.  A surprisingly long match.  I was expecting no more than five, maybe six minutes, and this one went about 12 or 14.  A very good match to start the show, and it set a high standard that not all of the matches that followed lived up to.  Punk looks as good as ever, and Umaga shows no signs of ring rust.  He’s wrestled maybe one or two squash matches since his return from injury, and that was a while ago as it is.  He looked awesome and dominant when he needed to, and Punk made him look like an unstoppable force.  A few slow spots during the match but overall a great opener.  The ending was a bit rushed, with Umaga hitting three big moves in the span of about 20 seconds, which is not his style, but otherwise it was great.  Unfortunately, Punk’s loss meant that the crowd lost seemingly all interest in the rest of the show, which was unfortunate, because without a good crowd reaction, sometimes matches turn out not very well, like the next match.

Christian defeated Jack Swagger to retain the ECW Championship.  Unfortunately, this was the worst match of the night.  Swagger looked terrible in the ring, and Christian sadly looked as though he was phoning this match in from the outset.  Probably because it’s impossible to work well with Swagger.  The guy’s overdominant in his matches.  I keep saying it, and no one argues against me, so I must be right, right?  Christian tried to make Swagger look good, but there’s no way anyone can get him over as a heel.  He just needs to go find another job or go back to developmental for a while.

John Morrison defeated Shelton Benjamin in probably the easiest pick of the night.  Morrison looked fantastic as always, and Shelton looked about as good as he has over the past year or so.  Ever since he moved to Smackdown, he’s been pretty bland, but having Morrison work with him made him look a lot better.  I’d imagine that The World’s Greatest Tag Team is going to get reunited in order to keep Shelton on TV and to give Haas a little push.  Morrison’s on his way to the top.  He pulled out some crasy moves, like that springboard 450 splash to the outside.  And I like his new finisher.  It’s flashy and looks awesome, as every face finisher should look.  He’s on a rocket to the top, and nobody’s going to stop him.  Good for him.

Miz’s little rant and Santino’s comedy was okay, but it went on too long, as most in-ring promos seem to go when taking place on a PPV.  I did find Santino’s comparison picture of Vladimir Kozlov to Sam the Eagle absolutely hilarious.  I hope Miz actually gets a match with John Cena soon, so we can stop listening to the Miz all the time.

Rey Mysterio defeated Chris Jericho to retain the Intercontinental Championship.  One thing I love about Rey is that, unlike just about every other wrestler in WWE, he is able to make every opponent he faces look great.  And because of his small stature (as far as WWE is concerned), his opponents are able to pull off more impressive moves.  Like Jericho’s spinning torture rack backbreaker drop, which was one of my favorite spots of the night.  Rey made Jericho look good, and that’s no small feat since Jericho’s been dull since he turned heel.  A ton of 619 attempts made this match very entertaining and breathtaking, and these two put on a hell of a show.  Here’s hoping they get a rematch at Extreme Rules in three weeks.

Randy Orton defeated Batista to retain the WWE Championship.  I should have known this one would be a DQ finish.  There’s no way Orton was going to beat Batista in a fair one-on-one match, at least not right now.  So after he exhausts all his other options, he slaps the referee, causing the DQ.  But man, it was really weird to see Ric Flair come charging down the ramp to save Batista during the usual Legacy beatdown this time.  It kind of made me think (and this thought was reinforced tonight during Raw) that everything Chris Jericho said about the aging wrestlers was completely true.  Both Fialr showings looked like he was a desparate man looking for that one last pop from the crowd, that one last chance to be a superstar in the ring.  It was tough to watch, and even tougher tonight on Raw.  The match itself was about as good as you could have expected these two to have.  It was decent, but if it was the main event, it would have been three straight PPV shows that ended with a subpar main event involving Randy Orton.  I wonder if anyone realizes he’s not as good as some people think he is…

John Cena defeated The Big Show.  Honestly, I thought this could go either way.  I was pulling for Cena, because he actually had more to gain from this match.  I’ll say this, though: Big Show needs to just hang up the wrestling boots.  He’s over the hill.  He shouldn’t have come back last year.  I remember reading an interview somewhere where he stated that “The Big Show” was his slave name.  So why would he willingly become a slave again after finally receiving his freedom?  He’s gained back all the weight he lost while he was gone from WWE, and he looks as bad as he’s ever looked in the ring.  He just needs to retire.  Cena sold those ridiculous body shots very well, and the FU at the end did seem like a minor miracle.  Let’s hope this gets Cena’s momentum going again.

Edge defeated Jeff Hardy to retain the World Heavyweight Championship.  I honestly thought CM Punk was going to cash in the Money in the Bank briefcase at the end of this match.  I, and I’m sure many Chicago fans, were disappointed to see no such thing happen.  However, these two really tore the house down, and I’m really glad this was the main event of a Smackdown-heavy night.  Actually, this is the first PPV in recent memory that had a majority of the matches be Smackdown-based.  And every Smackdown match was great.  Are we seeing the true changing of the guard?  Is Smackdown actually becoming the A Show?  Not likely, because of the network it’s stuck on.  But they have a ton more entertaining talent than Raw right now.  Anyway, back to the match.  It was full of twists and turns, tons of false finishes, Jeff Hardy using a sharpshooter, and the spot of the night: Edge’s spear to Hardy as Hardy was running the exposed security rail as Edge stood on the announce table.  It was awesome.  However, I did not like the end of the match.  I’m not a big fan of interference during a PPV match.  In fact, I kind of hate it when someone sticks his or her nose where it doesn’t belong during a big match.  It taints the match.  It ruins it in a way for me.  Still, it was a great match to end the show, and thanks to Matt Hardy’s interference, I went 7 for 7 in picks for the show!

All in all, this was a surprisingly good PPV for having three weeks of build.  Definitely better than Backlash, and it sets up a few matches for Extreme Rules, which comes our way just three weeks from yesterday.  I did watch Raw, and two matches were announced for it.  Orton vs. Batista in a Steel Cage Match for the WWE Title, and Cena vs. Big Show in a Submission Match, which was precluded by Show choking out, of all people, Jerry Lawler.  That seemed unnecessary, but Jim Ross took over the announcing duties and made Raw sparkle with his brilliance again.  Flair was…strange tonight.  As stated earlier, he looked exactly like Jericho had been portraying the legends for months now.  It honestly was a little creepy and a little sad how prophetic Jericho was.  Let’s hope Flair doesn’t come out of retirement.  It would be an insult to Shawn Michaels if he did.  Let the younger guys take the reigns for a while.  They’re damn good.

Oh, and one more thing: where the fuck are all the tag teams?  I’ll just let you think about that until next time.  Maybe I’ll do a top 5 or top 10 list if I’m feeling extra frisky.  But for now, it’s time to say good night.  I’ll see you all later.


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